So here i am again...

What happened to my poetry? My vision? My excellent forms of self-inquiry? Is there truly nothing left to where i can no longer derive much past the drivel of day to day occurances...

I keep wondering about my evolution as person, and i wonder if i am truly on an upward rise...or if it is just a gradual slope downard i wont notice until i hit bottom.

I can't wait for the ending of this one, 4 years seems like forever, the time here seems to drag on and on and on and i'm tired of wishing to make it thru, i just want to be out of here back into some place i can call home. Maybe once i leave this place things will be easier and things will better. Maybe i will be able to find serenity and peace of mind one day. Now it is just a constant shifting between apathy, depression, and euphoria. I think i'm getting more and more bi-polar and it's not cool.

Maybe manic depressive is the word.

Despite it all...

All i can do is keep going, nothing changes now.

I'm always having peices of my heart reserved for people incase they ever call back to me to take it...

I'm going to miss her sooo much, and she may never know, never really believe everything that she means to me....just how much i care about her, just how true and honest my love is, and she'll never believe that i wish i could take everything back and just be with her, just her. The way the smallest touch from her makes me go crazy inside, the butterflies turn my heart upside down...

tears flesh from bones leave only hearts open exposed for everyone to see bloody broken yet still beating despite, weight that bears down on us, we lift our voices as one and cry against, torment, anguish, sorrow, despair, and fight, rains that beat against our bodies...

Find another diamond and know, fates are still watching after me, sending the dramatic despite the current state of affairs, close the case, reclaim the smile, redo the ineveitable despite the imperfections

Hey kids

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